Hold the Cheese

If you've noticed, I've been trying to emulate popular news outlets. I just read them recently and am officially giving up on creativity. Definitely cheesier than I had envisioned, so I'm taking a dairy free diet. ( Okay, now I'm done. )

Today's post will be short, simply about a particular TV show I'm loving.

All Hail Tosh.0

Thats Tosh-point-oh for those of you who're actually interested. And it is the funniest show on television.

Hosted by comedian Daniel Tosh, the "apple-tini" sipping manly jock man no one is quite able to categorize, this show is priceless from start to finish. The show is based on the zany videos circling around the world wide web. Tosh.0 is that hub where they are gently picked up, dusted off, and then blasted to pieces with a sarcasmimplosion of... well... sarcasmimplosion is the best there is. Just watch the show. I've run out of negative adjectives.

There! I hope that was a good post. Although, on a scale of One to Internetless Nomad, in terms of comments, this blog is Amelia Airheart. And for those of you who are living under a rock, which is apparently all of our readers, she disappeared off the face of the Earth.

Love,

'Zuly

Brain freeze vs. The world

*annoying announcer voice*
Hellllllllo and Weeeeeelcome back to BRAIN-FREEZE!!!!! On today's show we will be bringing you:

• Movies 'Zul is anticipating.
• Music I'm loving at this very moment
• And Why I used first person in the first bullet

All that and more right after these important announcements!

Looking for someone to share all of your love with? Want some extra cash? Well now with the limited time offer, you can get your very own sister! That's right folks if you call now you'll get one fourteen year old girl! We'll even give you 19.99 plus shipping and handling to take her! Act fast and we'll even throw in this free 12 year old boy to go with.
no refunds, no matter how annoying the little brats get. Both children come with names. Not responsible for any ensuing lawsuits. Its your fault you tried to buy kids from an ad.

And we're back!!!!
Movies 'Zul is anticipating!
Scott Pilgrim vs. The world.
I love Michael Cera at the worst of times but this looks like its going to be the best of times. He's so sweet!! Plus it looks like the format will be nothing like the usual sappy Romance crap that we're all in love with. More like a comic book...
And Dinner for Shmucks. It looks funny and not crappy. That's all I've got to say.
Movies 'Zul is not anticipating!
Cats and Dogs: The revenge of kitty galore.
Need i say more? If the title includes the name of possibly the crappiest villain EVER then its probably the crappiest movie ever.


Music I'm loving at this very moment:
Regina Spektor: Who knew piano music could convey such emotion? And thats all before she even sings in her unique, peppy voice about her unique, powerful lyrics. Love her!

Jason Mraz: No doubt DinoRwar will be mad at me for talking about her precious Geek in the pink but his lyrics are also a thing of beauty. Here is a taste:

"If its a broken part, replace it
If its a broken arm, then brace it,

If its a broken heart then face it..."

And also... I'M GOING TO THE JASON MRAZ CONCERT IN SEPTEMBER!! And i'm telling the world.

And finally...
why I used first person in bullet number one.
Because I'm awesome. That's why.

Weeeeell.... Thats it for today folks. join us next week when we discus... Well Join us and you'll find out!! This is Azul, signing out!

Dick Cheney's heart and other small packages.

The Brain Freeze Times

Dick Cheney has no pulse.
Yeah apparently he had some major heart surgery where a pump is doing all the work. He legally has no pulse anymore and has to wear a bracelet that says so, in case something happens and people assume he's a zombie.

Here's the thing... I know what happens when you ASS-U-ME but come on! We already knew he was undead.



Political Humor Failures aside,

Good things come in small packages.
I am, of course, referring to muffins.
It has come to my attention that someone (ok, one person) wants me to do a segment on muffin flavors. Please comment with your favorite muffin flavor. I'd like someone, anyone, even someone minus a muffin fetish, to comment just so I can know someone has read this.

In other news...
I'm co-authoring a book!!!!
I'm supposed to just be dropping hints here but it was inspired by another Ass in our life.
And everyone please meet my co-author DinoRwar!
I'll let her post what she wants of the book, its still a major Work in Progress but a one-eyed peg legged pirate could see how much potential this project has (the peg leg really has nothing to do with it. Just painting a picture).

Love and cupcakes! (Oh fine, muffins!)
-Azul

Here's to hoping!

Its been more than a year since my last post, which feels like a good enough reason to post another one. The purpose of this post is really to see if anyone ever reads my blog. But while I'm at it, there's no better time for an update in the world of Azul.
This summer I've actually decided to count the number of books I've read. It seemed like a good idea in the first two weeks when I read 10 books in a row but then swim practice hit and I'm only up to 14. However, that is not to say I read anything so fast I did not take time to smell the roses, or that old book smell some of us enjoy so much. On my list were:
Libba Bray's "A Great and terrible Beauty" and the other books in that fantastic series
Darren Shan's Demonata Series (I read Cirque du Freak and thought "Why not?")
and Meg Cabots Airhead series
The first? I loved it. Not only is it unique, it is riveting. This series deals with the situations teenage girls dealt with in Britain's Imperialistic prime and also with the passions and emotions that drive those girls to their decisions in their not-so-typical situations. There is dark magic and power struggles aplenty... and this short little review doesn't do the book justice. If you're a teenage girl, go read it. Go.
The second and third series were mostly tributes to authors I have loved in the past, and though the books were well written, they were quick reads that were done in a day. However: If you want the perfect description of me, just read Airhead. Em Watts is me in a nutshell, if I were in a book based in New York City.
A Final Note: I was in Time Magazine!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes indeed I was informed at my confirmation that the first ever letter I'd written to the acclaimed magazine had been published. The reason I'd written was because of the Time top 100, because of a young girl named Reem Al-Numery. Her story really touched me, and I encourage everyone to read it. And while you're looking up old Time magazines, look up the May 15th issue featuring your truly!
Scratch that. I;ll just copy paste it right here. As long as I'm bragging, I'll see my act of anti-modesty through.

"The TIME 100 this year was full of big names, big people and big stories [May 10]. It was very interesting to read, but my favorite story was on Reem Al Numery. In high school I've been learning about the dangers of being a girl in an Islamic nation and was told these girls live their desperate lives without hope of change. It really moved me to see that a girl not much younger than me had the strength to stand up not only to her abusive father but also to an institution as powerful as the Islamic faith. Thank you, TIME, for not letting her get lost among the bigger names. Now she can serve as an inspiration to us all."
I've got to say: I feel pretty awesome.
If you actually read all the way through, THANK YOU! You deserve a reward because you're probably the first. Its not that I'm uninteresting... just not well advertised.
-Zuly